I Chronicles 5,6; Hebrews 10; Amos 4; Psalm 148-150

Sometimes I am conflicted about the will of God in my life. “Should I move or should I stay” is a line in a Third Day song that mimics my own questions. When nothing seems to be working out as I would like or had expected, I doubt my heart and look for sin or some other barrier deafening me to God’s will. I feel like the rejected firstborn or one of a whole lineage of people that God judged as unfaithful. When I search my heart I see the after effects of trauma, unresolved grief, periods of isolation from God’s community of believers, and the constant dripping of remorse. Still, I hold tenaciously to Jesus Christ, the One who knows me intimately – my Creator. Amos 4:13 says,

“For behold, He who forms mountains and creates the wind, who declares to man what his heart is, and makes the morning darkness, who treads the high places of the earth…the Lord God of hosts is His name.” He is the One who declares what my heart is – no matter that I am unaware of this heart’s condition.

Even when convicted of sin, my Lord Jesus does not leave me. He could have. He could have saved only Israel through the Levitical practice of offering sacrifices and left me in the dust. I Chronicles 6:49 describes the importance of the high priest’s function:

“But Aaron and his sons offered sacrifices on the altar of burnt offering and on the altar of incense for all the work of the Most Holy Place, and to make atonement for Israel…” However, Jesus Christ, said to God,

“Sacrifice and offering You did not desire, but a body You have prepared for Me. In burnt offerings and sacrifices of sin You had no pleasure. Then I [Christ] said, ‘Behold, I have come…to do Your will, O God,'” (Hebrews 10:5-7).

That once and for all sacrifice, that unwavering willingness of Christ to die for me, that love and understanding of my human frailty, is my inspiration to hold fast to what I know: God is faithful even when I cannot readily see His will for me. He encourages me through Scripture, through friends, through study, and through prayer.

“And let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful. And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching,” (Hebrews 10:23-25).

For example, I was reminded yesterday by one of my ‘golden’ friends to praise God in all things – in my sorrow, in my joy, in my confusion, in the most difficult and dark times. And today, God punctuated His reminder to praise Him as I read the last three chapters in the Book of Psalms which exhort Creation from “the heavens to the human heart,” (commentary) to praise God for His mighty works, for the assembly (the church), to praise God for His salvation and judgments, and finally for all things to praise Him:

“Let everything that has breath praise the Lord,” (Psalm 148-150).

So, my Lord God, with the breath You have graciously given me to know Your heart and to breathe in Your love for me, I praise You today – in word, in deed, in song, in quietness, and in loud “Halleluiahs!” You have a way of cutting through the fog and clearing the path to see that You are before me, always with me, and upholding me through all that has been and is to come. Most wonderful of all, I praise You for Your very Presence even now! Thank You Jesus, Lord and Savior!

Janet (jansuwilkinson)

All Scripture and commentary quotes from: The Nelson Study Bible, New King James Version, Trinity Fellowship Church 25th Anniversary Commemorative Edition, 2002.

 

I Kings 7; Ephesians 4; Ezekiel 37; Psalm 87, 88

I sometimes think all things should work out for me, here and now; as if I should completely find rest and satisfaction on earth. Expectations of God, of others, of me, and impatiently waiting for it to happen, now. Entitlement – a word to describe the belief that one inherently deserves privileges or special treatment. And I have no qualm in declaring with other worshipers, “All my springs are in you,” (Psalm 87:7). Hint to God.

Reality often strikes the senses like plunging your dry, warm body into a frigid pool of black water – shocking, awakening, slicingly sharp. Each time, I go back to my knees. Regroup, re-read Scripture, PRAY…“O Lord, God of my salvation, I have cried out day and night before You. Let my prayer come before You; Incline Your ear to my cry,” (Psalm 88:1, 2). Then more waiting…

When I forget that I have been redeemed, reborn, I feel like Israel who cried out to God, “Our bones are dry, our hope is lost, and we ourselves are cut off!” (Ezekiel 37:11) Yet, regardless of my culpability in getting lost, God reminds me of His unfailing love. He demonstrates His mighty mercy to Israel and by their example, to me. God took the prophet Ezekiel to a valley to see dry, bleached bones come together; sinews attach, and flesh cover as the bones came to life. He gives this same promise of restoration and revival to the drought within this earthly temple, this jar of clay, me. And even if these promises become sparks of light He shoots out of my fingertips to others, I will be glad. Like King David who dedicated his personal goods to the future sanctuary that his son Solomon, not David himself, would build; I take pleasure in being a conduit for translating concern for the things of God to my family and others in my little sphere of influence. I can make every word count, every effort all in, every passion submitted.

Ephesians 4:29, 31, 32 “Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” If my heart is turned to pleasing my heavenly Father and loving others, then the things of earth will pale in importance. How easy it is to trust God when my heart is set on obeying His commands. How satisfying it is to forget that I am and immerse myself in the “Great I AM.”

 

Janet (jansuwilkinson)

All Scripture and commentary quotes from: The Nelson Study Bible, New King James Version, Trinity Fellowship Church 25th Anniversary Commemorative Edition, 2002.

Ruth 2; Acts 27; Jeremiah 37; Psalm 10

Ruth asked Naomi, “Please let me go to the field, and glean heads of grain after him [Boaz] in whose sight I may find favor.” (Ruth 2:2)

Boaz blessed Ruth, “The Lord repay your work, and a full reward be given you by the Lord God of Israel, under whose wings you have come for refuge.” (Ruth 2:12)

I’m awestruck by the principal laid out in this beautiful story about Ruth who is listed as a woman in the lineage of Christ. Ruth received this honor by forsaking her people and all that she knew as a Moabite to follow the God of Israel. Boaz, too, was impressed with Ruth, a foreigner who submitted to the God whom her mother-in-law worshiped and moved to a land where strangers would become family. Ruth insisted on following Naomi back to Israel, and Ruth sought favor with Naomi’s people.

Sometimes I think that I am helpless to change circumstances that I find oppressive or depressing. Ruth’s story is a reminder of God’s covering and that each step brings me closer to God. Of course, each footfall is not cushioned by a bed of roses like walking to the altar on your wedding day; but can be more like a misstep – a twisting of the ankle as you throw out your hands for someone to grasp. The Apostle Paul never skipped a beat in these circumstances. Acts 27:22, 23 is an example. “And now I urge you to take heart, for there will be no loss of life among you, but only of the ship. For there stood by me this night an angel of the God to whom I belong and whom I serve, saying, ‘Do not be afraid, Paul; you must be brought before Caesar; and indeed God has granted you all those who sail with you.’”

“The God to whom I belong and whom I serve,” is this great God who knows what challenges I will face. He knows that when experiencing disappointment, tragedy, or isolation that I will wrestle with good and evil from within and without. Psalm 10:14 declares, “But You have seen, for You observe trouble and grief, to repay it by Your hand. The helpless commits himself to You; You are the helper of the fatherless.”

God does know. God does see. God does act on my behalf and for my good. I commit myself again and again to God who alone is my help. He may send that help through others, like the encouraging text from a friend on a particularly difficult morning; or the laughter with family that busts up the clog in my all-to-serious thoughts. These are the truths that teach trust and increase faith.

Jeremiah 37:20, 21 records the prophet’s simple request for life, “’Therefore…please do not make me return [to the dungeon]…lest I die there.’ Then Zedekiah the king commanded that they should commit Jeremiah to the court of the prison [a place near the royal palace], and that they should give him daily a piece of bread from the bakers’ street, until all the bread was gone.”

I remember once, in our early Christian walk, that my husband said, “When I die, I just hope to be given a place in a corner of God’s house.” How humble and how simple a trust in the protection and favor of God!  With deep affection and trust in my Lord Jesus Christ in all circumstances, I will seek Him with all my senses, for the morning’s opportunities and the evening’s graces.

Janet (jansuwilkinson)

All Scripture and commentary quotes from: The Nelson Study Bible, New King James Version, Trinity Fellowship Church 25th Anniversary Commemorative Edition, 2002.

Song of Solomon 1-3; Psalm 72; I Thessalonians 5

“Live in the light of what you already know”

Song of Solomon 2:8 The voice of my beloved! Behold he comes leaping upon the mountains, skipping upon the hills. My beloved is like a gazelle or a young stag. Behold, he stands behind our wall; He is looking through the windows gazing through the lattice.

What is your earliest childhood memory? One of my favorites is sidestepping cow chips to my girlfriend’s house on top of the hill, then picking grass and popping their heads like wheat as we spent the warm afternoon talking and singing made up songs, lying on the soft, tan cow belly of Bessie. Like Solomon’s playful approach to seeking his bride to be, my heart was light, full of confidence, and looking contentedly at all these days that seemed to belong to us. How time flies. And I felt that way again as a young adult and new convert. Salvation awakened the former lightness that had somehow been quenched by events and situations which had stolen peace and joy from the child. Do you remember when you first asked Jesus into your heart? Psalm 72:6-7 says, “He shall come down like rain upon the grass before mowing, like showers that water the earth. In His days the righteous shall flourish, and abundance of peace, until the moon is no more.” For me, God rained down His love like a flood, leaving me clean, feeling like the world was right again. Years of peace and the Mayberry life before little foxes crept into the vineyard, like the Shulamite’s brothers warned could happen in years to come. Were you surprised, disappointed, or even angry the first time God did not answer you, or allowed those unexpected hardships to attack you? I still clearly remember that day. I lost the faith. I forgot the promise of God to be concerned for all that I cared about. I picked up again the heavy yoke emblazoned with the words, ‘Do it yourself.’ First I found work to do, then I found out I needed a better education which led to working and going to school. Still not satisfied, ambition crept in and convinced me time after time that I needed a better career and more money. Like most predictable stories, my life reached a crescendo of chaos that brought on regret over the loss again of that child’s heart. I went from carefree to compulsive, from enjoyment of God’s creation to ignoring the sun, the moon, the stars in the heavens and the earthly angels sent my way. Sadly, even the spontaneous praise dried up and was replaced with words like ‘freak’n and crap’ on a regular basis. Why is it that we forget to live in the light? Why do I choose to live as if I am one of those who will be visited like a thief in the night – as if I do not know the Lord and His plans for me? For, I am a daughter of light. As written by the Apostle Paul in Thessalonians 5, “But concerning the times and the seasons, brethren, you have no need that I should write to you. For you yourselves know perfectly that the day of the Lord so comes as a thief in the night. But you, brethren, are not in darkness, so that this Day should overtake you as a thief. You are all sons of light and sons of the day.” I know this verse speaks of the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ, but the promise to me and to all believers is that we will not live in darkness because when we were born again, we became sons/daughters of light and sons/daughters of the day. Even as the sky is breaking open and the sun is beginning to shine once more in my life, I understand that I can live in the light of what I know. That God was, and is, and is to come. Peace returns.

2 Samuel 7-8; 1 Chronicles 17; Psalm 132; Acts 25

II Samuel 7:11 “Also the Lord tells you that He will make you a house.”

King David wanted to build a temple, an earthly house, for God’s presence to dwell; but God responded by saying that He would build David a house, a dynasty, from which our Messiah would come. Where does God want to live?

After owning a house for over 30 years, it has been difficult for me to move, not once but four times in the past five years.  Each move a lesson in letting go – separating self from friendly faces full of promise and breaking ties with coveted objects like the shattered ceramic pitcher completer of Grandma’s china set.

God allowed David to build His house, complete with detailed instructions to David and his son, Solomon, and that structure was glorious for the years that it stood before the temple’s total destruction. Glorious and yet a small thing compared to God’s promise for David’s offspring. I Chronicles 17:12-14 quotes God saying to David, “I will establish his throne…I will be his Father, and he shall be My son; and I will not take My mercy away from him…and I will establish him in my house and in my kingdom forever.”

What is the purpose of a house? A place where a man can hang his hat, a refuge from the storms in life, a labyrinth of secret cubby holes for giggling children to play hide and seek, an extension of a woman’s character and kindness? Houses are occupied and vacated, built and torn down, inherited or sold with barely a memory. Even the churches in which we worship are not our eternal dwellings.

We promise God that we will use our homes and our churches for His glory as if these wooden beams and nailed panel walls will hold His glory.  Like David, we promise God “I will not give sleep to my eyes or slumber to my eyelids, until I find a place for the Lord, a dwelling place for the Mighty One of Jacob” (Psalm 132:4,5). Do we really believe that these homes we cherish and that will perish with the last breath we take are exchanged for mansions in the heavens? I find this Hollywood image of a multi-million dollar open house viewing meaningless. Craning my neck at the end of a long, stately table to get a good look at Christ causes me anxiety. I fear that I am of no concern in the grand scheme of eternal life, so I do not find comfort and peace in my worldly view of the Big House in the Sky. I cannot think that I will find a dwelling place for Christ by walking or driving or flying. It seems too simple an assertion that I will see Christ in the next room or down the hall from where He sleeps.

David was humbled by God’s answer to his prayer. God basically said, yes, yes, David, go on and build me a house.  But understand that what you see is not my home; My Holy One will dwell inside you, your descendants, and people of all nations to come. And when you die, you will still be with Me; no separation, no loss, no doors between Us, and no moving away. We are His temple; not just a flesh and bones house. Our spirit hears His voice when He calls us home – His home – His eternal dwelling untethered from this earthly tent.

I Samuel 1-2; Psalm 120; Acts 5

Psalm 120:1 In my distress I cried unto the Lord, and he heard me.

The Biblical story of Hannah the woman who pleaded for a child has perplexed me on many levels. First I hear the deep grief and humiliation she suffered due to the social stigma of being childless. The love of her husband was not enough to bring joy to this barren wife. Her religious convictions and obedience to God were performed externally, yet she had no peace internally. Hannah focused on the one thing that she did not have, a child, and believed God was the only answer to her prayers.

Yet, I too have been enmeshed in my own myopic version of need. Even though I had family, friends, church, and home, that elusive advancement on my job left me grumbling. I’ve spent large amounts of time serving in the church and when my motives and priorities were challenged by family, I was indignant and held selfishly to what bolstered my self-esteem. Lately, I’ve seen this problem of narrowing perspective in my pursuit of what I believe will be in the best interest of a family member – I’ve told myself that I will not be satisfied until this is done.

The second enigma in Hannah’s story is that she promised to give this child back to God, literally. The child was two, maybe three years old, and Hannah actually took him back to the temple and gave him to the priest.  I realize there is a cultural and generational gap the size of Texas between Hannah and me, but she was a mother of her first child!  I am a mother and I can tell you that I would not have been able to fulfill a vow to God to give up my toddler! I would have been back in that temple, pleading to keep my child. Yet we do not read that Hannah mourned for little Samuel; instead each year she took him the garments she stitched herself, seemingly at peace with this arrangement. Arguably, she did have other children after her first born, but none can replace a child in the heart of the mother. So how was she able to do this?

A third perplexing statement in Hannah’s story comes from her husband Elkanah. While waiting for the day to give their son to the priest, he said to Hannah, “Do what seems best to you; wait until you have weaned him. Only let the Lord establish His word,” I Samuel 1:23. This is Elkanah’s first son by the woman he loves most, but he agreed to give up his son because Hannah said that is what she promised to do.  According to Judaic law, he could have dismissed her vow to God.

Instead, he dropped his worldly desires and accepted the story yet to be written when he said, “Only let the Lord establish His word.”

What if we could really let go and trust God’s will be done?

What if we really knew that God was on our side? Then we might say as in Acts 5:29a, “We ought to obey God rather than men.”

If we could believe or even if we could just live as if we do, perhaps then we would welcome God’s will and like Hannah be able to say, “No one is holy like the Lord, For there is none besides You, Nor is there any rock like our God,” I Samuel 2:2

Joshua 22-24, Psalm 116, Luke 19

Keep your chin up…hang in there…stay tough…are phrases that people use to encourage you to either stop focusing on your problem or to not give up.  Hollow words to those of us whose hope for the best ended with “A door slammed in your face, and a sound of bolting and double bolting on the inside,” (C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed). What is healing to this wounded and confounded soul is to do as Joshua encouraged, “… hold fast to the Lord your God, as you have done to this day,” Joshua 23:8. Yet, the days can be complicated and the nights restless once our head droops and eyes are cast downward.  It’s as if we cannot remember our pledge of loyalty to God.  Human nature has not changed all that much, for Joshua had to remind the Israelites long ago, “But take careful heed… to love the Lord your God, to walk in all His ways, to keep His commandments, to hold fast to Him, and to serve Him with all your heart and with all your soul,” Joshua 22:5.

“But,” you might say, “That is all well and good when everything is going right – when we are ‘on the other side.’ Besides, only Christ Himself could rise above despondency from losses such death of a loved one, a barren womb, or the destruction of addiction.” Yet even Jesus Christ wept with despondency. Luke 19:41-44 says, “Now as Jesus drew near to Jerusalem, He saw the city and wept over it, saying, “If you had known, even you, especially in this day, the things that make for your peace!” What is it that Jesus knew so intimately and with such certainty? He knew to sing Psalm 116:1 at the last Passover supper he shared with the disciples. He would have lifted the ‘cup of salvation’ and sung, “I love the Lord, because He has heard my cry…because He bends down from His place in glory to meet my needs.”  Jesus Christ knew even then that the disciples would speak words of no comfort, and that even their attempts to console Him would be of no use. It is not comforting to hear words from those who have not suffered greatly. Nor is it company to swap misery. What brings perspective to all this suffering is when we know, really know, that we can call to the Lord and Savior of the world to take action on behalf of just one. Notice the personal pronouns in Psalm 116:3-9 “The pains of death surrounded me, and the pangs of Hell laid hold of me; then I called upon the Lord, ‘Deliver me!’”

Therefore, hold fast to the resurrected Christ who knows suffering.

Hold fast to the trustworthy God who hears your cry.

Hold fast as you know to do, as your experience in this fallen world has taught you to do. Hold fast because the God of the universe delivers those who cling to Him.

Exodus 22-24; Psalm 109; Ephesians 6

You never know when you are going to need protection.  Sure, we pray for traveling mercies, protection in bad weather, safety in foreign territory, or help in getting out of dicey situations. What we cannot control we are told to ‘let go.’ Until we stumble upon the verses in Ephesians 6, we are complacent to throw up a few ‘bless me-s and mine.’ Eventually, tragedy or other dramatic changes will illuminate our quick and willing abdication of the power we have been given by God to stand and fight.

It would be nice if we could sit back and wait for God to manage our affairs, fight our battles, and supernaturally intervene. Frankly, I don’t think we’ve been given that option. Let’s consider that we are to get up in the morning and dress for the day in the clothes of a warrior.

The Israelites were warned about thieves who come to steal, abusers who afflict the widow or fatherless child, a shady loan-shark who would charge interest from even his own family, or a slanderer who would falsely accuse his brother (Exodus 22-24.) Unfortunately, these problems continue to this day.

This is not to say that God is not capable of taking the side of His beloved and fighting for his cause in times of duress. Prayer like that found in Psalm 109, calling on God to move in one’s defense, is the beginning of reaching up to God for deliverance. Why would we pray for His help if we did not believe God takes an active interest in our needs?

Yet it is in Ephesians that we learn it is also our responsibility to seek resolution to life’s problems with people, with circumstances beyond our control, and with our own vulnerability.

That is, we are to put on the whole armor of God.

Not the feathered hats, fencing swords, or stylish boots of the Three Musketeers. Life is not a comedy, and the Apostle Paul wrote in all seriousness what he knew every Christian should don in order to follow Christ. He said that truth is our motivation to stand firm.  The breastplate of righteousness is our own integrity and good deeds that will become our reputation.  Knowing the gospel of peace and taking it to others is our unwavering stance on salvation.  Faith in Jesus Christ is our shield against the onslaught of evil in this world. Finally, learning to speak boldly and rightly the written word of God is our only weapon allowed in this warfare against evil around us.

We stand, not as the youth David did in Saul’s oversized armor, but clothed with proper fit, individually dressed by the Spirit of God.  We are made ready by practice.

So get dressed; you never know when you will need protection!

JOB 14, 15, 16; Matthew 10:1-20

Job 14:14, 15 “All the days of my hard service I will wait, Till my change comes. You shall call, and I will answer You; You shall desire the work of Your hands.” – Job

Job 15:28-31 “He dwells in desolate cities, In houses which no one inhabits, Which are destined to become ruins.  He will not be rich, Nor will his wealth continue, Nor will his possessions overspread the earth.  He will not depart from darkness, The flame will dry out his branches, And by the breath of His mouth he will go away.  Let him not trust in futile things, deceiving himself, for futility will be his reward.” – Eliphaz

Job 16:21 “Oh, that one might plead for a man with God, As a man pleads for his neighbor!” – Job

Matthew 10:19-20 “But when they deliver you up, do not worry about how or what you should speak.  For it will be given to you in that hour what you should speak; for it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father who speaks in you.” – Jesus Christ

Supplication, pleading, fervently praying, depression, submission, longing for an answer – not knowing what to say, yet crying out to the only One who can give an answer.  That limbo sort of place between faith and acceptance of what may be. Like a psychrometer being swung about to pick up drops of moisture or to record dusty, dry air, I’ve arched toward the goodness of God’s merciful rain only to fling myself back into the ‘ashes to ashes and dust to dust’ despondency. So many times I go back and forth that I don’t even know what to pray. I am Job and I am Eliphaz, pleading my case and chastising myself for thinking I deserve better.  What sweetness and how grounding my Lord’s words are to me when He says that His Holy Spirit is able to speak for me. Even as I deliver myself up, I hear His voice of mercy that causes me to calm down and wait till my change comes.  Here I am, Lord, I will answer You. All my work, good or bad, it is You whom I can trust to set things right.

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